


Petey's penis plushie

by alexisriversong



Series: COWT 2020 [12]
Category: Deadpool - All Media Types, Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man - All Media Types
Genre: Crack, Deadpool being Deadpool, First Time, Getting Together, M/M, Meta, Plushies, Rutting, The Author Regrets Nothing
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-02-14
Updated: 2020-02-14
Packaged: 2021-02-22 16:04:12
Rating: Mature
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,006
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22718629
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/alexisriversong/pseuds/alexisriversong
Summary: Deadpool gives Peter a penis plushie and they get together. Also, Deadpool knows he is in a fanfiction.Don't take this too seriously...
Relationships: Peter Parker/Wade Wilson
Series: COWT 2020 [12]
Series URL: https://archiveofourown.org/series/1622722
Comments: 4
Kudos: 23
Collections: COW-T - the Clash Of the Writing Titans





	Petey's penis plushie

**Author's Note:**

> Written for the cowt challenge M1 mission: meta F
> 
> For the curious ones... This is the plushie!

"Petey pie!!!!" 

Peter looked up at the familiar appellative from his best friend (maybe boyfriend? He did look a lot at his ass and flirted a lot, not that Peter never looked. Wade was built!) Anyway, Wade was looking at him through the window in his bedroom with... A giant penis plushie?

"What the hell?!" He shouted at his friend, running to open the window and let him in. He was really thankful about the fact that he now lived alone since he was an adult (a 20 year old adult, thank you very much) and his aunt had moved in with Happy. 

"Hello Petey pie! The author thought it would be funny to make me give you this penis plushie pillow because they thought it was a good way to make us have sex" 

"What?" 

"What what?" 

It was not the first time he thought that Wade was crazy and it was not the first time he talked like they were in some kind of movie or comic. 

"You know... It's kinda creepy that you think there is some crazy person that thinks about us fucking all the time. The fact that you think we'll fuck only because some person thinks we will, also seems a bit non con" Peter frowned at himself "Why did I say all that?" 

"That was the author" 

"Okay... That was absolutely creepy" 

"Welcome to my life. I always know when the author is plotting something, I feel it in my head. It's like I hear voices sometimes!" 

"Yeah, I think that's all you man" 

"Really? Man? What's with you author?!" 

"Anyway, what's with that penis plushie pillow?" 

"Oh right! I won it for you at the fair! I shot every target for you" 

"Did you kill..." 

"Not that kind of target. I'm making good, you know that" he really seemed hurt at the implication of him killing anyone and thus breaking the promise, so Peter let it go and went to grab the giant penis to put it on his bed. 

They both started at the thing on the bed. 

"It's... Kinda cute though" admitted Peter.

"Yeah, yes it is" Wade was not looking at the thing though, he was looking straight at Peter. 

"Really? That's so cheesy!" Blushed Peter when he noticed where Wade's attention was focused. "So... You know what? If we are doing cheesy lines... That thing seems happy to see us" 

"Not as happy as I am every time I see you. Want to have a look?" 

Peter bit his lower lip while trying to stop his laughter. That was a really stupid pick up line. Then he frowned, wondering. 

"Are you seriously propositioning me?"

"When am I not serious about propositioning you? I mean... Have you seen you? That ass... Mmmmh" 

"I can never get when you are being serious or not" 

"That's the author's fault" 

"That's exactly what I mean" muttered Peter while facepalming and shaking his head. 

"I'm sorry?" 

Peter smiled a bit sadly and shook his head. "Can you take off the mask? I want to see your face during this conversation" 

Wade hesitated a second before doing as he was told, a bit self conscious of his scars but more used to Peter not reacting to them. 

"Nice to see your face. Now... Seriously, want to go out with me? Like, an item?" 

Wade's eyes went wide and he nodded. "Yes! Of course! I will go out with you at the blink of an eye!" 

Peter grinned widely and got closer to the ex merc, hand going to the other man's face to hold him close and kiss him. His scars were softer than he had ever imagined. He really loved him. Too soon to tell him though. For the moment, they kissed and kissed... And kissed some more. 

"Would you mind if we skipped the dates for now and went to the sex immediately?" 

"You won't hear me complaining here Spidey" 

And so they quickly stripped each other and went to move it to the bed, only... They landed on the penis plushie. They started to fight it off the bed, tangling with each other and with the thing and managing to end up both on the floor. 

"What the fuck? Did the giant penis just cock block me? Author!? What are you playing at?" 

Peter couldn't hold the laughter at that and they ended up, chuckling, naked, on the floor. The vibrations of their laughters made their erections rub against each other and made them moan. That lead to them rutting together right there on the floor, moaning and kissing and muttering each other's names.

"Want to fuck you" groaned Peter thrusting down on top of Wade. Who groaned and closed his eyes, thrusting up.

"Next time. Too close now" 

Peter nodded and kept kissing him while they rutted together. They were both close. Peter held Wade down and took hold of both their erections, rutting in his closed fist together. 

"Come for me Wade. Give it to me" 

"Yesss" They came together, holding each other panting bodies. "That ended up better than I thought it would. Thanks author, you are not totally inept" 

Petey just shook his head, got up and went to cuddle the giant penis plushie. 

"Okay, I got it, not complaining anymore" 

"You know, I'm almost starting to believe this thing that we are in a book or something" 

"Really? You'd be the first" 

"Shut up and cuddle me now" 

"Yes sir!" And he did, giant plushie forgotten at their side. They were almost happy about that thing. Peter was going to cherish it and cuddle it every time he could now. 

"Yup, we totally are in a fanfiction, I'd never even think that" 

"Yeah, sure" answererd sleepily the ex merc. 

They kissed again and and started to fall asleep, cuddling together. It was all going to go well, fanfiction author not wistanding.

"Love you" 

"Love you too"

There was silence for a bit before... 

"Wait a second. What?" 

"The author is totally laughing" 

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


End file.
